Super Mom

Okay, I am feeling really uneasy tonight after publishing my last blog post and reading various comments I have received. Let's all get this straight: I am NOT super mom. And, no, I don't think anyone actually thinks that, but the compliment leaves me feeling like a fraud. I am a good mom, but I think for the most part we are all good moms: we are all doing our best within our particular circumstances, but the idea of a supermom, a mom who can do it all, is damaging, and we as women need to support one another. We need to celebrate our strengths but also recognize our weaknesses, and guess what, it is okay to be weak. It is okay to fail miserably at times, as long we never, ever give up.

I am really lucky right now. I am able to be a stay-at-home mom and focus all of my attention on raising and enjoying my kids. I have been a working mom and a student mom before, and they are tough gigs, but moms do it, and we make it work. In fact, we make it look easy, when it is anything but.

So, yeah, the blog. I struggle with the blog because sometimes it feels like I am showing off. "Oh, look at me! Look at what I can do, or what we did!". I wish I could say I do it all for a pay cheque but that is a big, fat lie. I blog because I love to write. Writing is my gift and when I do it, I feel whole. Sure, I could keep all of this in a journal or make my blog private, but I also feel like my other gift is connecting to people. I love people, and there is nothing I love more than talking. For me, the blog is my way of starting a conversation and connecting with my friends and family, whom I miss terribly. It is also a really great way to help me remember this crazy, but beautiful life Mr. Level-Headed and I are creating. I love reading old blog posts! I am amazed at how much I actually forget - time is cruel. Like I forgot when Mr. Level-Headed was working up North, I used to count the Fridays until he would come home: 7 more Fridays. How did I ever survive that? Or, that Avery was obsessed with stuffed animals, particularly his giant pink unicorn he named Horny . . . hahahahahaha! Seriously. How can I forget this stuff? But I do.

So, yeah, at this particular point in my life, I can spend my afternoons going to museums, or indoor playgrounds, or to the zoo, and I cherish those moments. Those moments make me feel like a good mom. Those moments are moments I did not get with my Big Three because I was too busy going to school. Those moments are the moments I live for and want to remember, but trust me, there are a lot of moments I don't want to remember. Like tonight (See! I now feel the need to air out my dirty laundry to offset any images of Mary Poppins I may have conjured up for you today), Avery had a basketball game at 5:30pm and then a soccer game at 8:30pm. Mr. Level-Headed is away in Ottawa and since I was sick yesterday, I desperately needed to get our house back in order and still manage to pick up some groceries. By some miracle, Elliot's shift at the Bulk Barn was canceled, which meant I did not have to take the babies to the late night soccer game . . .  hallelujah!

But to make all of this work, the babies had a whole whack of TV today, while I ran around, straightening up. Yes, I use the television as a babysitter. It is bad. I know, but she is the best babysitter and the cheapest one I can find. Then, instead of taking the hour and a half while Harriet napped to do something with Leif, I chose to write my blog. Again, not mother of the year worthy!

By 4:45pm, I managed to get everyone in the car and we left for Avery's game. We were late. Well, not late for the game, but he missed the warm-up, and then I drove away. Yep, I did not stay and watch his game. Instead, I had to take the babies to Superstore to pick up some groceries. Then, because the Superstore here in Winnipeg is the size of two football fields and whenever I shop there I curse it and swear I will never go there again, I was late to pick Avery up. Again, not super mom. 

We rushed home in order to drop the babies off and unpack the groceries. Elliot was home at this time. He took care of the groceries while I fried up some hash browns to go with the chicken I had cooked earlier in the day. Okay, so I do get bonus points for actually cooking a chicken earlier in the day, BUT there were no veggies on the plate. There were some apple slices, but only two. 

25 minutes later, Avery and I rush out the door. Poor Avery is eating supper in a plastic bowl in the car. We did manage to arrive on time for his soccer warm-up, though. Woo hoo!

By the time his game was done, and we had run through the McDonald's drive-thru on our way home . . . ugh! I lose all mom points there, it was 11pm, and guess what, I was greeted at the door by my two babies, who were still wearing their clothes from earlier that day and who were so sticky and dirty they looked like two street urchins from a Dickens novel . . . I kid you not! Even Harriet noticed it when I put her to bed: 

"My hair has a spider web in it, mom". 

"No, that is just food, Harriet. Good night, dear".

No, I did not bath them. No, I did not brush their teeth. No, I did not read them a story. No, we did not say our prayers. I simply gave them some cereal because, according to Leif, Elliot would not feed them . . . ugh!, put their jammies on and tucked them into bed.

It was 11:45pm before I was able to sneak out of the room. EEEEEK!

And let's not even talk about the state of my house, or the fact, that instead of dealing with the disaster, I decided I needed to blog and put everyone's mind at ease: NO! I am not super mom. I am NOT doing anything special over here. I am just like everyone else - trying to make the best of a pretty tough situation, and making one giant mess while I do it . . . ugh!

But hey, I feel so much better getting all that off my chest . . . tee hee!

I am such a fool.

And for no other reason than I wish I could go back and smooch on those adorable baby cheeks:

The real reason I blog: I never want to forget.