Wednesday, 11 May 2011
Why a blog?
So, without further ado, here are my rugrats:
Yes, the look on his face tells it all. This is Avery, our entertainer. Trust me, he will do ANYTHING for fame or infamy; it really doesn't matter. Just last week I met with his teacher because his classmates came running into the school after recess tattling: "Avery ate a worm!". Upon further investigation, I learned that this did not happen once or twice, but THREE times. Yuck!! Trying to keep my cool and the vomit that is slowly creeping up the back of my throat at bay, I asked him why he did this, and he responsed: "Because it makes the boys laugh and the girls scream!". Ah, yes, of course! This was followed up by an intense debate over whether or not raw worms will make you sick.
Me: "Avery, live worms can carry germs and could make you very sick if you eat them."
Avery: "So, should I cook them first!"
Me: "NO! You can't bring the BBQ to school and you are not using my microwave." This is where I remember that I am the adult in the conversation and that whether they are cooked or not does not really matter.
Me: "Avery, never mind that. Just don't eat worms, they will make you sick."
Avery: "But, I am not sick. I did not throw up so they must be okay for me."
Me: "No more eating worms or you will never watch television again. You got me?" Insert judgement of my peers here. I am TERRIBLE for empty threats, and yes, I am fully aware that they are one of the worst parenting strategies ever, but what is a mother to do when her logical brain has fizzled out after 13 years of sleepless nights and cartoon watching and his seven year old brain is spry and making endless connections? Really!!
Update on worm-eating: As of right now, Avery has decided that television is far more important to him than the adoration of his fans, but I fear what his next stunt may be (confession: my fear is mingled with some anticipation because this kid is hilarious and I love how he approaches life). I will keep you posted!
This is Elliot. He is my tender-hearted, deep thinking worrier. We always say that Elliot was very disappointed with this world when he arrived and remains so. In fact, he is living proof that colic can last up to the first 8 years of one's life. I kid you not! In contrast to his brother, the worm-eater, a couple of weeks ago, Elliot was super agitated, even moreso than usual. He wasn't sleeping well, and he was incessantly bothering his brother and sister. I thought I was finally going to have to put him up on Ebay, which is another one of my favourite empty threats. Insert judgement of peers here. Yes, I know I should not threaten to sell my kids. It is not funny and it is cruel. Again, what is a mother to do? Anyhoo, one evening he walked sheepishly into my room and crawled up into bed with me. He curled his little body up close to mine and asked "how long does it take a piece of pencil lead to kill you?". I know I should be used to the bizarre things that come out of kids mouths by now, but I was stupefied. "WHAT?!" He then proceeded to tell me that the week before he somehow, and this involved a very lengthy and very improbable explanation, swallowed a piece of lead from his pencil and has been waiting for his imminent death ever since. My poor baby!! How is he ever going to survive in this world? I worry about him so much, and I should be thankful that his future aspirations do not extend beyond living in my basement and playing video games. Yes, terrifying to his father, but comforting to his mother . . . tee hee!
This is my mini-me, aka Zoe. She truly is amazing!! Recently, Derrick and I were watching her play on her school's boys volleyball team. Yes, I did say boys. We live in a small community and they did not have enough boys to make up the team so Zoe and her friend, who are the captains for the girls' team, were asked to join them. As we were watching them play, I kept getting weepy. Here was my baby girl, who up to the age of 3 could not jump with both feet off the ground at the same time, confidently jumping up to spike the ball against the opposing team. She was stunning!! These are those proud mama moments, where you get fleeting glimpses into the woman she is becoming and you think: "I can't believe she chose me to be her mama. I truly am blessed to be a part of her life!". So, now I am crying once again. This is what she does to me. I am so proud to call her my daughter!
Well, I did it! I have completed my first post. I really hope I do not become obsessive about this. Have I told you I can become obsessive over crazy things? Yeah, that's me!